Toothless Wonder

In the span of a week, Grant has lost both of his front teeth!  I think he looks absolutely adorable like this! :)  There is just something about a kid with no front teeth that just makes you smile, isn't there?  Well, the first one he lost at school and calmly told the teacher he lost.  The second one he was at home after school with Brock and Grandma and just kept pulling until it came out....Now, I have to tell you that the tooth fairy took about 3 days to come for his first tooth, and Grant thinks there must be a lot of kids losing teeth and that she was really busy.  She finally came and the very next night he had another under his pillow....Do I even need to add that the tooth fairy is taking several days to come for this tooth???  He/she must be VERY busy, or is slacking off and going to bed too early or something????  Let's just hope she does remember to come eventually!  For Grant's sake.  He has been so patient though and just says, "Well, the tooth fairy must have been really busy again last night, she didn't come!"    Poor guy.  Oh, he still has 3 more pretty loose teeth too.  I told him he needs to learn the song, "All "I want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth", but he thinks he wants more than that for Christmas this year! HA!

Basketball Boy

So, Brock comes home and tells us he wants to play 4th grade intramural basketball.  We explain to him that it is 3 nights a week, which means he must do homework right when he gets home so we can eat, go to basketball, take showers and get to bed on time (hopefully without fits).  He agrees to this and so we began practice a few weeks ago.  He has done very well and not complained about lack of play time, etc (for the most part).  Tonight was the long awaited night...the 1st Game!!!!  There is an A team and a B team.  Brock played on the B team, but was probably one of the best on the team.  He took off on the first play with the ball and dribbled clear down the court and shot and almost made it...Phil and I sat with our mouths gaped open.  We couldn't believe that was our son that just did that! :)   He played great and had a blast.  He came off the court a sweaty, stinky mess...but with a huge grin on his face.  The A team won by A LOT, but the other team was small so it was many of their A team playing against our B team.  The B team lost, but only by 1 point and the boys played great.  And again...the smiles coming off the court.  It was a fun time for all of us.  Well....Kiara didn't especially enjoy sitting for that whole time, but thank goodness she shifted between daddy, grandpa and grandma!  We are so proud of him!

Halloween and Pumpkin Fun

Time to carve the pumpkins!  This year was Brock's first year to completely carve his own pumpkin.  I was a little nervous about letting him use a sharp knife on his own (yes, I'm a protective mom), but he did GREAT!  (His is on the far right of the picture)He got a little frustrated that he couldn't get it perfect (just like his Paw-Paw), but the more he worked on it the better it got.  He did a terrific job. I was really proud of him.  Grant also worked some on his pumpkin.  He designed his face and then helped Dad do the cutting.  It ended up looking great too and he was very proud of it (his is the one on the left).  Kiara slept through most of the process of carving pumpkins, but came down at the end to get her hands in the pumpkin and even taste a bit, which she didn't like so much!  She liked taking the lid off and on the pumpkin and seemed to wonder what this was all about.  When Phil did hers he wanted to make it look like her with big eyes and 8 teeth, four on the bottom and four on the top!  It ended up looking a little creepy!

Time for trick-or-treating!!!!  I think Kiara couldn't quite figure out what was going and why she had to wear this pumpkin outfit, but she was darn cute if I do say so myself.  She hates things on her head or around her face so we were sure it wouldn't last, but she tried to push it off, it didn't slide off and so she left it alone pretty much the entire time.  When it was time to get it off, she was pretty happy though!  Here we are ready to go trick-or-treating just right around our neighborhood.  Brock ended up being

Annikan Skywalker (from Star Wars). He used Grant's costume from last year, so that was nice.  The face is so real with his blue eyes sticking out that it was almost eery when you looked at him.

Here are my three trick-or-treaters. Aren't they cute???  I think so!

Grant was Jengo Fet (Star Wars).  Don't ask me what/who that is, but the boys know and anyone who watches Star Wars knows!  His costume was really neat too, but the face mask didn't allow for his nose too well, so his little nose was smashed and by the end of trick or treating, his nose hurt and he wanted that mask OFF!

We ended our trick-or-treating at Grandma and Grandpa's house!  I love this picture.  It shows me so much more than trick or treat fun.  This picture to me shows the love that two brothers have for their little sister that even in trick-or-treating that she doesn't understand and they can't wait to get candy...that they love her enough to hold her hands and guide her through the process.  Sounds cheesy I know...but they are so sweet with her all of the time and so I just love this picture.

CAUTION...

Yes....CAUTION!!!!  If you want to read a happy, feel-good, praising God in the storm blog...do NOT read this one.  I need to just get some things out...and I'm totally okay if you don't read it! :)  So, I'm angry...angry at God, and just life in general right now.  Is it God's fault?  No, and I know that, but I don't know "who" else to be mad at...so He's getting the brunt of it right now.  Don't worry...I still love God, and know He is with me and helping me, and I know He will get me through this time...But I'm mad. And I've told Him that, so it's not a shock if He reads this :)  I just need to lay it on the line.  I'm mad about so many things right now stemming from the pain in my neck and head.  It's been consuming me and I'm hoping by laying it on the line...it will help me get past it and get back to trusting God completely again.  So here goes...an incomplete list of what I'm angry about because of the pain...
I'm angry that....

my family is bearing the brunt of this pain...
the pain in general that has lasted for 6 years...
i can't work out as i want to and have gained 5 pounds
i have to fake it all day at school to survive it
when i get home i can't seem to fake much more
i can't pick up my daughter without thinking of how my neck is going to feel holding her
i can't play football with my boys in the backyard because even throwing the ball hurts
that the pain has lasted 6 years
that i'm constantly at doctor's appointments instead of with my family
that my husband has to pick up A LOT of the slack around the house
every thing that i do, the pain is a factor in
people quote scripture to me that makes me feel guilty for being mad
that i am judged by other christians for my feelings
i have to drink clay because i'm so desparate for something to help me
there are days i spend more time with my chiropractor than my family
so much time of my day is spent to "treating" my neck...meds, icing, clay treatment, etc...
i don't sleep well because of the pain
i can't be the mom/wife that i so desparately want to be
that i've had pain for 6 years (yes, I've said that 3 times)
that i fake it so much that i'm okay
most people don't have a clue what it is like every day to deal with this (although I don't wish it
        on anyone)
by the time i go home, my energy is zapped completely
that i have become selfish and self consumed in my pain
my family suffers right along with me but in emotional ways
i can't just be normal and do whatever i want
everything i do has some level of pain in it, no matter how simple
that i've had pain for 6 years and we still have no "diagnosis"

There are probably so many more things, but that's what came to mind at this moment in time.  Yes, this was negative, but you know what....it feels good to get it out.  To purge it from my body.  I'm praying (yes, I'm speaking to God again) that this will help in the emotional/spiritual healing for me....I want to be that positive, God-praising lady from a few posts ago...I'll get there...I'm trying and I know the Lord is guiding me...Thanks for letting me spew my anger and hopefully it didn't bring you down.  That was not my intention...this was a purely selfish post...Pictures and positive things to come....

These are some pictures from my dad's retirement party last month. They had a hogroast, along with veggies that were cooked inside the hog.  Then there were baked beans and a pasta salad...these are a few of Kiara eating that day and finding that they were tastes that she wasn't used to eating and she wasn't quite sure that she like them all! (As you can see)  She cracks us up with her faces!  She is so animated and we're pretty sure she will be a drama queen in her own right!  I think the paybacks for me and my behavior growing up is going to multiplied with this little gal.  Trouble with a capital T!  But she's so stinking cute that instead of getting angry...we melt and kiss on those adorable cheeks.  Little stinker. 

STINKER

For those of you close to our family you will know that our middle child, has the nickname "Stink"...which came from us always calling him stinker when he was "little" (not because he stinks in general :))  Anyway, we have a new stinker in the family...she happens to be our "little bug".  We've always called her "little bug" or "cutie bug"...well we may have to change her name to "stinker".  It seems she is always into something.  I'm sure the boys were at this age too, but it's been a long time since they were at this stage and our house isn't quite as baby-proofed as it was for them apparently.  The picture above is just one example of her messes that she loves to make.  She also pulls out ALL of the plastic containers from the kitchen cabinet...checks out all of the canned goods (by taking them out and setting them in the middle of the floor)...cleans out my sock and underwear drawer...inventories her toybox (or dumps it..all in how you look at it) and her most recent trick that the picture doesn't do justice...this is after we have picked them all up and "let" her play with this amount....she is an AVID reader...she pulls out all of the books of her interest to look at randomly all over her room! :)  She is a busy body and cute as a bug...well, I don't think bugs are generally cute, so she's as cute as any little girl I've ever seen...but she is definitely a STINKER!!!!!!!!!

Easy to be Negative

I'm sitting here on a Saturday morning....in quite a bit of pain (head and neck), with a clay mixture rubbed onto my neck (to pull out inflamation, etc)...my family is cleaning while I sit and do nothing...after 6 years I of battling this stupid neck pain...it continues and is as bad as it has been in several years. My husband and kids have to take the brunt of me being in pain and do everything around the house.  My sister-in-law is awaiting results and a plan to deal with a serious medical issue...it has been a horrible waiting and stressful process for her and her family to say the least...My dear friend is still struggling through grief and pain...My student at school is still battling brain cancer (although her last MRI results were great)...A student at school on Thursday told me that his dad was in jail for beating on his mom, right in front of him and his siblings....Hence the title of my blog...EASY TO BE NEGATIVE...how easy is it to be negative?  Junk surrounds us or those we love all of the time.  Why doesn't God take all the junk away and let us live happy, carefree lives for serving Him?  Well....it just doesn't work that way.  Throughout scripture it tells us over and over that we WILL suffer, go through hardships, and face persecution....and it also tells us in that to rejoice and praise Him in it all.  Do I feel like it?  Not always if I'm honest.  But I'm learning to CHOOSE to rejoice and find the things to praise him for...Like...Thank you Jesus that I'm able to be out of bed with the pain...Thank you Jesus that my husband (and kids) are so incredible and pour out love on me and are so willing to take up my slack right now...Thank you Jesus that sister-in-law knows you, trusts in you, and is glorifying you in the process of her medical issues....Thank you Jesus that my student, Keri, is not scared of the cancer but is standing up to fight it and at the same time encouraging others and best of all, praising and glorifying you in the process.  Thank you that it led her to be baptized and her relationship is growing in you.  Thank you Jesus that the little boy who watched his mom be beaten feels safe enough at school to share that with us and give us the opportunity to share Jesus with him...and that he was kept safe in the midst of the fighting.  Thank you Jesus that my dear friend is learning in this process of grief that You never leave her and that it is okay to be angry and tell you how she is feeling.  Thank you that she is learning to be real with You and listen for your voice....

So, does life stink sometimes?  Absolutely!  Life isn't fair and doesn't go the way that we want it....But PRAISE GOD...He is there for us in all situations, good and bad, and will not leave us for a moment.  Praise God that there is ALWAYS something to be positive about and praise Him for...I'm learning so much right now in my women's study (The Frazzled Female) and through scripture...Would I be learning so much if I wasn't in trial?  I doubt it...So thank you for the negative God, because it helps me seek out the positive and seek out YOU in the process.

As I look at this picture...it reminds me that the leaves have to change colors and die to be so beautiful and to renew life later on...it is much the same with us, isn't it?  We have to change and die to ourselves before God can truly work in us...and I think that trials and pain and yucky things are what get us there.  So...praise God today, even through the junk....maybe even BECAUSE of the junk!