Several years ago, I chose a word for the year. That is something that I don't typically do. It had been a special word for me throughout my adult life, but I felt the Lord telling me to remember it and to believe it. The word? ENOUGH. It has honestly been a theme for me for years with some different meanings and I just wasn't sure where I was headed with it. While I'm not going to go into specific circumstances of how God used this word, I can tell you that it has been so so good. It has been profound and at times I've been brought to my knees with the Lord reminding me that He provides. That He is enough. That I am enough. That there has never been a day when I haven't had ENOUGH (fill in the blank...). There has always been enough.
So after this year of focusing on ENOUGH, I realized that it wasn't just the word ENOUGH...but that God provides enough. He has always provided enough for me. Jehovah Jireh. One of the names given to God which means "The God who provides". So after that year, my theme (per se) became Jehovah Jireh...Enough. Then the song came out (check it out here if you don't know it: Jireh (Elevation Worship) I talked about getting jewelry or something to commemorate it and found myself imagining a tattoo in my mind. But I'm not a tattoo kind of gal and I also didn't want to seem like I was just quoting the song. I don't have anything against others doing it, but it just wasn't my thing. I talked about it with some friends for over a year but it was always a far off thing that I just talked about. Until this year. This year was deemed my year of fun, which is a whole different blog. One day I was talking to a co-worker and commented that I had a design in my mind but I didn't want people to think it was "just the song" because it meant so much more to me. She quickly said...who cares? Who's the tattoo for? You know what it means to you. WOW!!! That night I went home and made a design. The next morning I booked the soonest after school appointment I could get and began the countdown.
So, on October 11, it was a celebration. A celebration of ENOUGH. A celebration of fun. A celebration of friends who have supported me and showed me God's love over and over. Three friends came with me to celebrate God's goodness in my life. And I have to tell you that I was nervous. Not of the pain...yes it hurt, but not horribly...not of regrets. I have none of those. But of the reaction of others. The funny thing is though...I didn't enter this lightly...I chose to mark powerful words of reminders to me. They aren't for anyone else. I've happily explained them to many people and been able to give witness to God's awesome love. But when I look down...those words are for me. A constant reminder of how over the years, no matter the highs and lows, God has always provided enough. Always.
Here's a glimpse into the process:
When I see those words every day, all day long, I'm constantly reminded...
I am ENOUGH. (regardless of how I feel, am told, or see)
What I do is ENOUGH. (even when made to feel otherwise)
He always gives me ENOUGH (sometimes JUST enough) of everything
(patience, strength, compassion, energy, etc)
His strength is ENOUGH.
He will supply ENOUGH of what I need.
When I feel unloved, He is ENOUGH.
When I feel lonely, His presence is ENOUGH.
When my strength wavers, His strength is ENOUGH.
Jesus, My Provider.
He provides enough. Jehovah Jireh. Enough.
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